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From	Message
bobspringett 02-Apr-25, 20:32	Shiva How did the constipated mathematician solve his problem? Answer:- He worked it out with a pencil and some paper.
lord_shiva 02-Apr-25, 20:49	Yeesh I did that once--many years ago. Haven't had such a problem in a very long time now. Couldn't really say why--maybe I drink enough water. Though my dentist prescribed xylitol for dry mouth--so possibly not? I have taken to spritzing it in the evening after I brush my teeth, before retiring to bed. Maybe it will help. She also wanted me to chew xylitol gum 3 to 5 times a day, which would be expensive so I knocked it down to one prolonged period most days.
lord_shiva 02-Apr-25, 20:50	Opposite End of Alimentary Canal I prefer to focus on the upper portion of the tract--except when I'm standing on my head.
mo-oneandmore 03-Apr-25, 10:31	Bob and Shiva Fingers work well for the little balls that stick to the ass hairs.
victoriasas 03-Apr-25, 10:38	What a classy conversation lol 🙄
mo-oneandmore 03-Apr-25, 11:31	Shiva, Bob, Vic Those little balls that stick to ones ass hairs are called "dingle berries" for some unknown reason. AI Overview A "dingleberry" is slang for a small piece of dried fecal matter clinging to the hair around the anus, often used to describe a problem in dogs with long fur.
victoriasas 03-Apr-25, 11:34	Way to keep it classy, mo.
mo-oneandmore 03-Apr-25, 17:22	Those pesky dingleberries can be painful to get off because they usually come with the hairs, but after you get them off, they work well for sling shots and/or you can flip them 10 or yards or so with your finger. Here's another solution. www.ebay.com
lord_shiva 04-Apr-25, 09:08	Dingleberries My aunt explained what dingleberries were to me when I was a young man. It was in reference to someone who had been described as being as useful as a dingleberry. While I’m sure we’ve all experienced that, it has been many years for me. We purchased a bidet attachment for our toilet. For the first year I was perturbed by the fact my toilet paper usage doubled. This was during Covid, when paper was a luxury item. Nevertheless, at the beginning off the shortage I inventoried our supply, and estimated we had at least eight month’s worth left from our purchase the prior year. Those Costco bags last a good long time. Ultimately I figured out how to go back to my regular consumption—spritz first. If you wipe first you have to use a second pull to dry—preferable to using the hand towel for that purpose. But by spritzing your (presumably) virgin back door first, most of the time you wipe clean, so the paper is barely soiled. Superb. Once in awhile a second spritz and dry wipe is required, which is really no different from without the bidet. Big fan of the bidet. Now, actually sometimes in the summer you’ve been working, or you just feel itchy and dirty, and you go spritz and dry and you feel like a new man again. Almost as good as taking an entire shower. So that increases toilet paper consumption just a little bit. I learned as a young man observing the pile in the outhouse the proper toilet procedure is to wipe, fold, wipe, fold, wipe… It was useful seeing that as no one had ever explained it. So the mystery was why wash your hands afterwards? I never (almost never) soiled my fingers performing the usual ablutions. But for washing the hands I douse with water then shut off the tap. Lather with the soap, rub like a raccoon awhile, then turn the tap back on with the back of my wrist to rinse. I like to do a thorough job of getting the soap off, and again back of wrist to shut the spigot off, sometimes first cupping water to pour over the handle to rinse any soap or soil off the handle. I estimate I use about 20% of the water used by someone who just leaves the tap run full bore the entire time, and my hands are 100% (or more) as clean.
lord_shiva 04-Apr-25, 09:14	Classic Another excellent use of dingleberries: abc11.com This one is for the spiritual edification of Vic, who would have been disappointed absent any mention of our dear glorious leader. This topic doesn’t really belong in the Welcome thread, but doesn’t really merit a thread of its own.
victoriasas 04-Apr-25, 10:50	I think this club has reached a new low, but when you’ve got classless trolls trolling, that’s hardly a surprise.
apatzer 04-Jun-25, 18:09	Welcome (satyrhill) m.gameknot.com to the club.
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