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 How Conflict Affects Chess |
deeper_insight
01-Jun-15, 09:34
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I'm new to this site,but on other chess sites I found out that the key to conflict is to not react at all.Stay stone cold with your emotions,never write back to bullies(especially in a blitz scenario),which will simply lower you to their level,and simply remain complaisant.Usually,when the chess site bullies seem to understand(in their limited mental capacity that they usually have)...that their childish behavior is not causing anyone to lift an eyebrow,they usually fizzle out and disappear.In other words...some chess bullies need to be trained like a dog.No joke.And not all bullies are those young kids either,some are much older,I found out over the years.Those older ones simply are either insecure or feel the need for some kind of attention,that they do not deserve.
If their negative behavior continues,then its best to get a group together and put in a complaint against said bully or weirdo to the site administrators.Usually several complaints,not just one,does the trick!Hopefully,the administrators will block said bully from being able to write anyone again and then they will probably leave the site permanently,which is a good thing.
Tom
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postalpeet
01-Jun-15, 12:33
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Mr. M once told me to treat everyone as if they were a Snowgoose and avoid all trouble with decent folks.
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baddeeds
01-Jun-15, 14:09
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Deleted by baddeeds on 01-Jun-15, 14:17.
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I agree with pandemonium_666 for the most part, unless it's an extreme situation. In High School, I used to react, but I learned that better was just to ignore them because they were doing this for attention. Weather negative or positive, attention=attention. So, ignoring them extinguished the behavior.
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In addition,when I was 13, first learning the game and not knowing how to play the game or anything about chess. Well, it first started with people not being nice but just playing, and after losing, they said soemthing like, "There, you only lasted that long because I allowed it since you don't know how to play the game." Thank goodness that I am through with it, and no matter what they said, I became good enough to coach and mentor and give people optimisim that I wish, I once had. But, the idea is, "let by gones be by gones" And, don't let people get the best of you, in that kind of situation.
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@reubencpiplupyay:
A thought just came to mind, and this is the entire history of my first two sentences in the last post. But, that entire history and why I enjoy the game is shown below. gameknot.com
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rebuen's right
when in grade school the bully kicked clobbered and assaulted everyone -- I was the only one who fought back; got kicked in the belly -- hard -- for my trouble -- yet, won his respect; and from then on I was the only one he left alone -- he would even stand up for me, not that I needed it, from then on.
As in Life-- so in chess.
there's only one way you can coast -- downhill.
fight, Fight, FIGHT!
Attaquer toujours Attaquer!!!
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deeper_insight
18-Jun-15, 13:58
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deeper_insight
18-Jun-15, 14:05
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Shamash and others....
Sometimes the way of stealth,"staged" weak innocents and fear even with extreme strength and no fear,duck,weave,hide,come back and strike..like the Ninja is the way to respond,fight,come back,instruct and even gain reinforced and discovered respect.The resultant factorial quite often additionally gains an army of followers who then become stronger through the same lessons taught against all adversaries.....
Hmmmmmm.....
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